Two things have come from Berkeley: LSD and Unix. Coincidence?
Fellow Business Executives:
As the Chief Financial Officer of this business that employees 140 people, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barrack Obama will be our next President, and that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way.
To compensate for these increases, I figure that our clients will have to see an increase of about 8% in fees, but since we cannot increase our fees right now due to the dismal state of our economy, we will have to lay off six of our employees instead. This has really been eating at me for a while, as we believe we are family here, and I didn't know how to choose who will have to go.
So, this is what I did. I strolled through our parking lot, found 8 Obama bumper stickers on our employees' cars, and have decided these folks will be the first to be laid off. I can't think of a more fair way to approach this problem. These folks wanted change; I gave it to them.
If you have a better idea, let me know.
Sincerely,
Management